Monday, April 21, 2008

Roger Maris = Peter Frampton: The Canonical List of Baseball/Rock & Roll Equivalencies (Pt. 1)



Elvis Presley = Babe Ruth
Chuck Berry = Ty Cobb
The Beatles = Mickey Mantle
The Rolling Stones = Willie Mays
Bob Dylan = Ted Williams
Van Morrison = Joe DiMaggio
Robbie Robertson = Dom DiMaggio
Neil Young = Hank Aaron
The Kinks = Frank Robinson
Aerosmith = Carl Yastrzemski
Bob Marley = Jackie Robinson
Captain Beefheart = Rogers Hornsby
Sam Cooke = Ed Delahanty
Creedence Clearwater Revival = Sandy Koufax
Sly and the Family Stone = Dwight Gooden
The Eagles = Pete Rose
Santana = Don Sutton
Aretha Franklin = Tom Seaver
Stevie Wonder = Joe Morgan
The Doors = Kirby Puckett
Elton John = Warren Spahn
Tommy James and the Shondells = Jack Morris
Bruce Springsteen = Barry Bonds
Southside Johnny = Bobby Bonilla
Little Steven = Matt Williams
James Taylor = Edd Roush
Sam and Dave = Fred Lindstrom
Terry Jacks = Scot Thompson
Jeff Buckley = Donnie Moore
Jefferson Airplane = Dock Ellis
Fleetwood Mac = Fritz Petersen and Mike Kekich
U2 = Roger Clemens
Elvis Costello = Greg Maddux
Brinsley Schwarz = Mike Maddux
Weezer = Tom Glavine
Prince = Pedro Martinez
Morris Day = Oil Can Boyd
The Ramones = Mark Fidrych
Rod Stewart = Steve Carlton
The Small Faces = Rick Wise
Cream = Jim Palmer
Mountain = Gaylord Perry
Ten Years After = Jim Perry
Lynyrd Skynyrd = Catfish Hunter
Black Oak Arkansas = John Kruk
Molly Hatchet = Mitch Williams
Pure Prairie League = Jody Davis

{Special thanks to Rob Sheffield for his help in preparing this list}

13 comments:

Gavin said...

Love this, although I don't agree with all of it.

For example, the Ramones had way too long a career to be a Fidrych equivalent--I think he matches up much better with the Sex Pistols.

T. Nawrocki said...

That's a good call. To be honest, I don't remember the reasoning behind a couple of these, like why Tom Glavine = Weezer. But I'm sure there must be some logic to it.

Gavin said...

Do you remember why you assigned Mantle and Mays the way you did? I don't necessarily disagree, but I could also make a case for them being flipped.

Gavin said...

Wouldn't a better Weezer analogue be Rick Ankiel? Looked totally washed out of the game for a few years, and then made an astonishing comeback.

Gavin said...

Also:

Sigue Sigue Sputnik = Joltin' Joe Charbonneau

T. Nawrocki said...

The Mantle/Mays thing goes like this: Two friendly rivals, both at the top of their games, Mantle peaked a bit earlier and stronger but Mays lasted longer, was a bit more well-rounded. Can't think of one without the other, and can't really ever decide which was better overall.

You can also make the case for the Beatles = Babe Ruth, but he fits too perfectly with Elvis.

Pike said...

Sometimes your cleverness terrifies me.

T. Nawrocki said...

My cleverness mostly just depresses me, since I can't figure out a way to turn a buck from it.

Gavin said...

For Little Steven, I don't get Matt Williams.

I like Tim Wakefield better: that continues your matchup of the E Street Band with members of the 1992 Pittsburgh Pirates. And both of them hung in there for an improbably long time, Wakefield eventually getting his ring in Boston and Miami Steve becoming more famous than ever on the Sopranos.

So obviously, Max Weinberg is Doug Drabek, Clarence Clemons is Kirk Gibson, and Roy Bittan is Andy Van Slyke.

T. Nawrocki said...

And you've also got Jon Landau as Jim Leyland.

Gavin said...

Yes! And Nils Lofgren is Jeff Kent.

T. Nawrocki said...

And Patti Scialfa is Chico Lind.

Gavin said...

Funny!

But I think band members and affiliates who come on after Springsteen gets muscular should be San Francisco Giants. So Brendan O'Brien is Dusty Baker. Patti is, I don't know, Yorvit Torrealba? Maybe Benito Santiago if you're feeling generous about "Rumble Doll" and her backing work on the Stones' "One Hit to the Body."

Garry Tallent is Chico Lind, perhaps.